funny honey :)

Seems like as soon as a friend gets hitched, the relationship confessions stop. Forget TMI—she won’t even give you “I.” Just think of Beyoncé, who’s so tight-lipped that Jay-Z was taken aback when she called him “my husband” at the Grammys. So what’s everyone else not talking about? We found out.

by Erin Zammett Ruddy

I have a habit of hiding money from my husband. I’m an accountant, so naturally I’m in charge of handling the household finances. But he’s aware of how much I make—and spend. During tax season, I do a lot of extra work on the side, and instead of depositing the checks, I cash some and treat myself to massages, facials, lunches—basically anything that doesn’t come in a shopping bag that I’d have to explain!” —Marisa, 34

Related: Why We Said “I Don’t” to Wedding Night Sex

My man is not the most motivated guy in the world, so I bribe him to do things around the house by giving him bl*w jobs. I currently owe him three for the crown molding he put in the bedrooms!” —Elisa, 29

I’m a staunch feminist, but I took my husband’s last name when we got married. The reason: We’d made a deal that if I did, I could name all of our future children. First and middle names, no questions asked. Not even my mom knows about that deal. Everyone probably thinks I’m a traditionalist deep down.” —Brooke, 28

My husband and I shower together a lot, which isn’t exactly what you’d call a secret. But when we’re in there, I almost always pee. I guess that’s pretty gross, huh?” —Laura, 32

I love when my husband has to go out of town for work. I hear friends talk about how much they miss their husband when he’s gone and how hard it is to juggle everything. I feel neither of those things. When he’s away, it takes me back to the peace of mind I felt when I lived alone. I watch what I want, eat dinner at 10:00 P.M., clean the house—or not. It’s when I get to be Claire, rather than Claire the wife, and I cherish it. Sorry, honey!” —Claire, 30

My husband signed a prenuptial agreement. My family has a lot of money, and since my husband came from practically nothing, they forced me to get him to do it. Wow, I’ve never told anyone that!” —Sarah, 29

OK, I know that this is going to sound cheesy, but I really believe that my husband is my soulmate. I’m lucky to have found him, to be married to my best friend and to be genuinely happy in my relationship. But if I talked about it with the abandon I feel, I’d drive everyone crazy.” —Tracey, 25


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